Are you tired of trying to prove yourself?

I see this all the time whether it is women returning to work after maternity leave or being promoted into a new role. There is a need within us to prove ourselves

The reality is we all want to be successful at what we do, however I know that sometimes we can get so caught up in the doing that we lose sight of the helicopter view and and we spiral out of control because we are knee deep in the doing.

I know when I was in this situation, I wanted a remote control with a pause button so I could press pause and catch up on all the things that needed to be done. Needless to say I didn’t get that and in hindsight, that was not the solution!

What I see is people trying to prove themselves so much

  • so that it leads to burnout
  • so that they become agitated, moody, overwhelmed which can lead to damaged relationships
  • so that they stop valuing themselves as they are focused on what they are not achieving
  • so that everyday feels like an uphill struggle and when the struggle gets too much, they can give up or want to give up.

You might hear your loved ones tell you to leave that job, its not worth it but you know that is not the answer, you just need to figure out a way to achieve what you want to achieve but in a different way.

I know this, as I was that person, I worked hard to prove myself on numerous projects within different organisations for years.

If you are in this space, you need to ask yourself

What does proving myself mean to me?

What would happen if I didn’t ‘prove yourself’?

Who specifically am I trying to prove myself to?

What exactly am I trying to prove?

For me, when some days were so overwhelming where I felt like a headless chicken, although acted like a swan, serene and calm on the outside and frantically paddling underneath the surface, I used these strategies to gain perspective:

  • I asked myself, Will any of this matter 5 years from now?
  • I reminded myself that no one was going to die! (I was never in the medical profession so that was true for me)!
  • And also told myself, what doesn’t kill me, makes me stronger

3 tips to prevent burnout if you are working hard to ‘prove yourself’

  1. Ask for help, it shows that you know your limits and require some assistance to get you through the transition. If you are struggling to ask for help, just consider if a team member asked you for help, how would you perceive it?
  2. Accept help, all to often, the help can be there but you think you can do it better yourself or that is ‘should’ be you that does it, but think about what you can achieve with the time you are getting back from someone helping you and also the learning they may get from doing that task.
  3. Have a conversation with a trusted advisor, whether that is a colleague, manager, friend or coach, somewhere you can express yourself and gain another perspective of the situation.

If you feel like you need a safe place to discuss your challenges, a non-judgemental listener, a sounding board to hear yourself think and to come up with solutions, then why not book a complimentary call today?

I work with professional women who have demanding jobs to create work-life balance. To hear more about my ‘From Overwhelm to Work Life Balance’ programme, drop an email to info@inspirecoaching.ie

Remember if you don’t do anything differently, nothing changes.

To read past clients testimonials and know more about how I can help you, visit my website at www.inspirecoaching.ie